Thursday, December 11, 2008

Moving On(ward)

I'm taking a step away from my ranting posts about easily pregnant newlyweds to share that as of today DH and I have taken two more steps toward meeting our child. This afternoon DH had his individual interview with our social worker. All went well. DH was nervous about it. Well, he didn't say he was nervous about it. He said he didn't want to talk about it, which translates to--- he was nervous about it. I reassured him that he would do fine. Then I warned him not to screw it up. OK, I didn't really warn him not to screw it up. . .that wouldn't be very supportive. . .I didn't say it in those exact words anyway. . .I'm kidding. . .mostly. Actually, I gave him a kiss and told him to be himself. And I did ask him if he used the last of the toilet paper while he was home in the morning to please replace the roll before our SW came, just in case.

I called him from work to see how it went. He shared two highlights with me. One was that our SW said we have really good dogs (thank you to whoever suggested frozen peanut butter in the kongs). It turns out he's more of a dog person that I thought. He actually adopted a dog from the same shelter from which we adopted one of ours. The second highlight was that our SW said he admired DH for how he acted toward J, one of our fellow MAPP class attendees. J has a good heart, but he's one of those people who always have a story about themselves to share during a discussion. Every conversation path led back to him. It didn't matter what the topic was, J had something personal to say about it. There were several classes when we might have got out early if J hadn't started sharing. After a few meetings, some others in class started rolling their eyes when J started talking and they were not the most social to him during break time. No one was outright rude, but no one was clamoring to chat with J. DH would actually respond to J's stories with a quick comment and would happily chat with him during break. As he told me, "J's not a bad guy. He just talks too much." He was extremely patient and our SW, who was also one of our MAPP trainers, noticed. I know my guy is a good guy, but I'm glad that it was clear to our SW, too.

That's was DH's step toward our child. Mine was to get a physical done today. During our training, they warned us that the medical reference form is the one most likely to hold up the completion of the homestudy-doctors are busy and forms get lost in the shuffle. Last week when I called my doctor's office to make an appointment for the physical, the earliest one they would give me was late January. I decided to be assertive (unusual for me) and I even played the adoption card. Luckily, it garnered some sympathy and they got me in with a resident today. He filled out the form in front of me and I just have to stick it in the mail tomorrow. Yay me! Now we wait for the rest of the reference forms to be completed and returned, and then we meet with our SW one more time. I love forward motion!

Just a note about my recent ranting about my coworkers/TTCers. I am so grateful for all the supportive comments. It feels good to be understood. I'm feeling a bit better about my "drowning in pregnancies" situation now. Maybe it's only because I feel like my life is moving forward today, but I have a more laid-back attitude about it. I needed to rage and cry for a couple of days about the unfairness of it all. I'm sure they'll be some painful moments this year when I'll come back to it, but at this point it is what it is. And for the moment, I'm moving on(ward).


Wendy said...

Here's to moving onward!

I'm glad that you and your DH have made progress - that's such a good feeling, isn't it? I'm glad that his interview went well, and that your physical is done.

Congratulations - 2 more big steps hurdled!

Beautiful Mess said...

Moving forward is ALWAYS a plus! I'm so glad the meeting with the SW and your husband went well *YAY*
Enjoy your day!

melissa said...

Hi, found your blog on Lost and Found, Hubbs and I have just started the adoption journey and just looking for some fellow travelers.

Me said...

I lurve positive progress. :)

Anonymous said...

Thanks for your comment on my blog. You are still my hero in all this- you've been a few steps ahead of me for a while, but watching you make it through things helps me think maybe I'll get through it too.

Congratulations on being that much closer to having your home study done! :D That's great!

Lost in Space said...

I'm so glad you are making such great progress!! What a relief for your DH to have his individual done. The story about him being so understanding to J is very touching and shows what a wonderfully patient and understanding man you have on your hands.

We are here for you every step of the way - the good, the bad, and the horribly fertile co-workers. Many hugs.

Hummingbird said...

Yaay, DH and yaay you! So glad to hear things are moving forward.