Tuesday, October 13, 2009

Major Turn of Events

We found out today that our baby boy's biological father died this past weekend. His biological mother is already deceased.  Both were products of the system (abuse, neglect, foster care) and had many life-long issues because of that.  Their early deaths are sad, but not shocking. Our son is now legally an orphan. I don't know what that means in regard to our attempt to adopt L. Our social worker is coming later this week for a visit and I'm sure we'll have more answers then. Tonight, I'm just going to reflect on the life of a young man who fathered a beautiful boy but, because of being terribly wounded as a child, was unable to be a father to him. I am so glad our L won't have to continue the cycle. 

I'm just stunned right now. 

12 comments:

Shelby said...

Wow, I too am stunned. I'm sorry to hear about this for Baby Boy's sake. I'm sure this was news no one expected.

However, on the other hand, it just highlights how blessed L is to have you. I am so heartened to hear how well he's adjusted to his home.

Lost in Space said...

Wow, Karen, I'm sorry. That has to be a lot to take in right now with so many mixed emotions. Hugs, sweetie.

Wendy said...

So sorry to hear about this. I hope your visit with the social worker goes well.

kalibug said...

OH, that is so sad. I am sorry. Prayers for you all!

Claudia said...

Oh wow. That really is shocking. I'm sorry that this means your little man will not be able to know his bio dad at all, but I'm so glad that he is already with you. I imagine you must be feeling a pretty strange mix of feelings at the moment - I hope all the legal confusion is sorted out really soon.

emilythehopeless said...

oh wow! {hugs}

Thorn said...

Yikes, I'm sorry to hear that BL's has had this loss, whether he realizes it or not. I'm sorry that his biological parents ended up in the situations where they weren't able to parent him and weren't able to save themselves. Peace to your family and theirs.

I don't know if you read her blog, but the blogger Atlasien dealt last fall with the death of her now-adopted son's biological mother (they were a preadoptive placement then, I believe) and she might have advice for how to process these losses with L down the line if that's something you or he need.

Steph said...

Wow. I am glad L is too little to remember any of this. He has already been through a lot at his young age.

Beautiful Mess said...

Oh no! I'm so sorry about this. I wish that your little guys can feel the love you are giving him. He deserves to be loved just as much as you deserve to give the love.
*HUGS*

RB said...

Wow, what terrible news. I hope that your SW can shed some light on the situation.

Barb said...

Oh my Gosh. That is so very sad. I'm so sorry. But I'm SO glad you came into sweet L's life and he into yours.

Fiddle1 said...

OMG. That is so shocking and sad. so, so sorry.